Yes Yes Yes we do, We've Got Spirit, How about you!!!

Over the past few miserable years of my life, I turned into one of those people who have a hard time during the holidays – well, Christmas to be exact. I hated feeling this way because Christmas has always been a huge deal to my family – especially my mother who always made that time magical for us when we were kids. When my sister got married, my parents and I were absolutely dreading the fact that she might spend Christmas with her in-laws instead of us. Luckily, she married into a family that has turned Thanksgiving into their huge holiday and so I was able to continue spending Christmas with her and soon her children who made Christmas twice as much fun.

Then I got married and had to grudgingly admit that it would only be fair to spend Christmas with the in-laws every other year. But in an absolute childlike way, I dreaded the idea – not in any way because of my in-laws - I just couldn’t imagine spending Christmas away from my family. It was perhaps the only step into married adult life that I just didn’t want to take. Husband agreed to spend the first Christmas with my family and so I felt I had a year reprieve. And then my brilliant mother stepped in.

As crassly materialistic as this is going to sound, one of our traditions is to exchange a fairly absurd amount of gifts on Christmas Day. They are by no means extravagant, in fact, it is a running joke how many bargain bin presents there are. We just enjoy spending hours opening presents (very slowly, one at a time, pausing to explain some story behind every gift). When husband woke up that first Christmas Day with my family, he was practically speechless. And it did not escape my attention that my mother seemed to have bought twice as much for him than anyone else. She claimed she wanted him to feel like one of the family, but she didn’t fool me. No, she was out and out bribing the man. And it worked. My husband has agreed ever since then to have Christmas with my family (okay, it helps that he loves to host his family for Thanksgiving and his father, an Episcopal priest, works on Christmas Day, and its easier for us travel wise).

Anyway, I have gotten waaaayyy off track. To make a long story short (I know, I know, too late for that!) Christmas has always been a big deal for my family. Since my parents passed away, though, it has felt like most of the joy has been taken out of the holiday. If it weren’t for my three nephews, I can’t imagine how I would have dragged myself out of bed that first Christmas Day without them. In addition that year, and every other since, carried with it the equally painful recognition of having yet another Christmas come and go with no baby of our own. And so, I’ve become one of those people – just trying to get through the holiday season.

But something amazing happened yesterday. Over the course of the day, I talked to my sister about four times. She called me from the mall for gift ideas. I called her to figure out what I could contribute to Christmas dinner. She called me to clarify travel plans. You get the picture. In one of the conversations she mentioned that her oldest son (who may even surpass my mom in his love for Christmas traditions) had to be driven to the craft store to get supplies for gifts he is making for me and husband. My heart melted into a little puddle on the floor – not only has he thought to make us gifts all on his own, but the odds and ends lying around the house aren’t good enough and he needs actual supplies for them!

After I hung up with her for the final time, I started thinking about how excited that Christmas was almost a week away. Then it struck me so strongly that I actually froze in place for a second: my Christmas spirit was back!!! I literally felt like I had years ago. Just like the Grinch, my heart grew three sizes that day.

So for those who celebrate it, have a very merry Christmas. And I would probably be remiss if I didn’t take a moment to thank dear husband for sacrificing spending Christmas with his family all these years so one little piece of me hasn’t had to grow up.