Fast Forward 4 1/2 months and.....

I'm a mom!!!! A mere 10 days after my last post, I got the phone call that would change our lives forever. A mere 9 days after that I found myself in a hospital in the Midwest watching my beautiful, amazing, lovely, perfect son being born. Yes, after 5 plus years of trying to get pregnant, we wound up having little over a week to prepare. Not that I'm complaining...a long wait period probably would have driven me mad.

(I know, I know, I know, a true blogger would have been blogging the milisecond she hung up the phone and every day thereafter. I don't know why I didn't blog about it anymore than I know why I decided to write this post today.)

After all my fears (justified though they were), we had a truly amazing adoption experience. We met our son's birthmother a few hours before she gave birth. We sat with her and her family for hours and got to know each other. She graciously allowed me to stay for the birth (my husband was sent to the waiting room sans complaint!) and I can never thank her enough for that priviledge. I honestly don't know if I would have been so generous in her position. While he was in the hospital, he spent his time with us (the hospital gave us our own room) but we visited a few times with his birthmother. We also saw her once before we left the Midwest.

Those meetings were emotionally charged to say the least. Prior to going through it, I couldn't imagine sitting down with the woman who would ultimately make our dreams of parenthood come true. It was hard to see the pain (both emotion and the physical) she was going through, but I will cherish the time I had with her. Now when I talk to my son about her, I can tell him about how much she loves him and how strong a woman she is. It also gave us the opportunity to express our endless appreciation to her for choosing us to parent her son. I also believe the time we spent together helped her feel at peace with her decision.

He is now four months old and everday of those four months has been better because of him. Its strange. For so many years, I kept wondering over and over how life could be so unfair, how two good people could be so unlucky. Now I wonder what I ever could have done to have deserved such joy in my life and for such a complicated process as adoption to have worked out so smoothly as it did for us.